Fredas, 3:35 PM, 31st of Morning Star

Marcurio came back several days ago, he says he was worried I wouldn't be able to fend for myself, but I think he actually missed me.  Either way it was an awkward greeting, he happened to arrive just as I had finished addressing a group of mages, the mages here do not know him as my lover, I had told them he was just a sword-for-hire.  So when came up behind me and put his hands on my shoulders I'm sure the mage's were all confused.  I was a bit too, as I hadn't really expected him to come back.  I am so very glad he did though.  I'd been staying in my small room in the students hall up until that point, but with him back, we have officially moved into the Archmage's quarters.

Of course Marcurio wanted to hear the whole story about how I became Archmage.  It was not half so complicated as he thought however, seeing as the Psijic order practically babysat all of us through the ordeal.    The eye of Magnus, that monstrous powerful artifact that Tolfdir had brought back from Saarthal turned out to be even more powerful than we had expected.  It succeeded in catching the attention of the Thalmor, specifically the weasilly Anacano who had been hanging around the college, claiming to be an 'adviser'.  Anacano attempted to tap the power of the Eye, I'm still not sure why, perhaps he thought he could actually control it, perhaps he was just so weak minded the eye gained control of his mind.  Either way he put our college, and the entire city in grave danger, summoning spectral creatures from outside mundus when he attempted to tap the power of the Eye.

In order to gain access to him, so that I could defeat him I needed to get Magnus's staff, a powerful artifact held in Labrynthian, put their by Shalidor himself.  Trust me when I say that I got on a horse and I rode through the night as fast as the poor beast could go to get to Labrynthian.  When I got to the ruin I continued to run, making no attempt at stealth.  I doubt anyone has cleared a ruin that quickly in the history of Skyrim itself!

After acquiring the staff it was a simple matter of taking down the magical barrier and killing Anacano once and for all.  After that ordeal I was named Archmage, seeing as both the former Archmage, and his assistant had been slain in the scuffles.

I am helping a fellow mage with a Dwemer inquiry he is working on at the moment, I am fascinated by the Dwemer as well, so I hope that our experimentations work out!

Several days later

I'm at the college of Winterhold.  The mages here found something of great magical power under the ruins of Saarthal.  It's power is so great even I was able to feel it, all the way from the temple of the Blades.  Marcurio stayed back with the blades.  He has taken a liking to ancient dragon lore and decided to stay and study with them for a time while I discovered what the tremors of arcane power were emanating from in Winterhold.  I find that oddly enough I miss the pompous bastard.  He is an excellent lover.  The thought of him clouds my mind at the most inopportune times, it's difficult enough for me to navigate now that I am on my own again.  I am continually reminded of the fact that Marcurio believed it was possible for me to get my vision back.  Perhaps after this business with the eye of Magnus is taken care of I will pester him to explain to me just how he thinks it would be possible to go about retaining ones eyesight.

There is a Thalmor 'ambassador' here who will not stop lurking around.  He seems more than mildy interested in this artifact the college is holding here and I'm sure he'd stop at nothing to see its power become his own.  I keep trying to find an opportunity to knife him while no one is around, but he seems to have caught on to my hatred and is avoiding being alone for more than a split second.  Damn.

Loredas, 9:33 PM, 11th of Morning Star

Marcurio and I are spending the night in Orothiem, a small cave we just recently cleared of Bandits.  He remarked with a laugh that it seems strange the leader of the Thieves Guild, the Dragonborn is spending the night in a dirty cave surrounded by fresh corpses.  I suppose to an outsider perhaps it would seem absurd, but this is where I feel most at home.

I intend to return to Lake-view soon and perhaps spend a few days there, see how the little girl is, and make sure the house is in good repair.  Marcurio has offered to accompany me, it seems he does not wish us to part ways just yet, I am fine with that, although I'm not looking forward to introducing him to Lucia, she's a very curious child and is sure to ask too many questions.

Marcurio has been bothering me these last couple of days.  He is insisting that with all the arcane knowledge in Skyrim, there must be a way for me to recover my eyesight.  I don't know why he cares so much, I long ago resigned myself to the darkness.  But if only to keep him from nagging about it I will look into it.  I suppose he may have a point, I'm not sure I could handle the disappointment though if I actually did try finding  a way and it turned out to be a dead end.

My hair has started to grow back.  Strange, it's been nearly three years since the accident and never once before now had it shown any sign of regrowth.  It's coming in rough and choppy and Marcurio says it's a silver white.  It used to be auburn back when I had long locks.

The thieves guild is back on its feet, as it's guild-master I will have to check in every month or so with them, but I don't intend to spend any more time than I have to down in the ratway, it's still very putrid down there, despite all the effort they're putting into making it more hospitable.  With Mavin's permission I gave Mercer's house to Brynjolf, he's a good man, honorable too, which is rare among those thieves.

Fredas, 7:24 AM, 3rd of Morning Star

I spent the night at CandleHearth hall in Windhelm.  I plan on setting out for Riften in an hour or two to inform Brynjolf that the Skeleton key which Mercer Frey stole from Nocturnal's Sanctuary has been replaced.  The Pilgrim's Path is what they called the route I had to take to arrive safely at the inner sanctum.  It was no easy route, although meeting the ghost of Gallus at the entrance of the temple certainly helped.  He was able to give me a few hints, the most helpful was in pointing me in the direction of a certain long deceased adventurer who had a diary on him that Marcurio was able to read.  It detailed the four challenges of the Pilgrims Path, or at least had cryptic notes on them.  It was sufficient however.  The first challenge was simple: defeat the guardians of the temple.  We managed to take every one of the ghostly figures out silently and quickly.  The next was similarly simple, once we deciphered the notes: avoid the light.  Marcurio helped to guide me as we traversed from shadow to shadow, staying out of the rays of the burning light.  The third followed along the same principles: Plunge the temple into darkness.  We doused the lights and a doorway opened for us.  The final challenge was the only one either of us had any real trouble with.  The dead adventurer's notes had spoke of carrying on, but when we arrived at what appeared to be a very solid brick wall marking a dead end 'carrying on' seemed difficult to do.  We stood and perplexed over just how to carry on for nearly an hour before Marcurio had a stroke of dumb luck.  In frustration he hurled himself at the wall.  Amazingly it worked, the wall vanished and we were transported to the inner sanctum of Nocturnal.

The Daedric Prince herself appeared then and spoke to us.  Although she held a rather condescending tone, I am sure that she was pleased with our efforts in returning the skeleton key to her sepulcher.  She granted me any of the powers that Nightingales could posses.  I chose the Shadows, as the other two had limited use to me with my lack of vision.

I finally caved and slept with Marcurio last night.  It's been months since my last encounter of such nature, and it reminded me how much I miss it.  Perhaps it's not such a horrible mistake.  I was rather expecting him to be flaunting his victory today, but he hasn't even mentioned it, which is to my liking.  He also is not acting any different towards me, something else I was afraid of.  I hate to think that he views me as just another woman to mark on his apparently ever growing tally.  According to him he tries to woo a different woman every time we stop in a major city, I find that rather disgusting, but to each his own.

Morndas, 2:12 AM, 30th of Evening Star

The guild has been good to me, better, in fact than I could have ever expected.  My bounty is paid off and I am once again welcome in all the towns throughout the Rift.  After running several mindless jobs for the guild it came to our attention that there was definiteley someone trying to take us out.  I investigated of course, and, after traveling to Solitude and forcing the truth out of a certain Argonian there, discovered that it was a Dunmer by the name of Karliah who was so intent on making our guild suffer.  Mercer Frey, the guild-master told me that this Karliah was a murderer who had killed Gallus, the previous leader of the Thieves Guild.  It turned out however that he was only covering for his own past.  After recovering and decoding Gallus's journal it was plain to all of us that Mercer was the one who had really killed Gallus.  Unfortunately Mercer has since disappeared and we are at a loss to locate him.  Brynjolf suggested that he may be intending to try to steal the eyes of the Falmer since he made off with many maps and notes relating to them.  Stealing the eyes had apparently been Gallus's last big heist he had planned before Frey murdered him.  If that is so then we must move quickly, those eyes are worth a fortune, and it is doubtful anyone will ever hear from Mercer Frey again if he succeeds in recovering them.

Karliah had Brynjolf and I inducted as Nightingales.  Marcurio 'just happened' to disappear as we were speaking to her about the induction.  I swear that man is more afraid of commitment than wealthy seadog...he has however tried many times to make a move on me as we traveled together.  I've shut him down hard every time.  Perhaps I'm being stubborn about it, but I still miss Erandur and am not ready to enter into a meaningless relationship with a crazy destruction mage no matter how suave and intelligent he may be.

While travelling back from Markarth we decided to swing up to Saarthal since I had finally gotten the mages permission to investigate the ruins in my search for the last piece of the Gauldur amulet.  We found it, deep in the ruins along with a very curious orb.  Tolfdir, the mage who had accompanied us into the ruins asked that we tell the Arch-mage of our discovery.  I did, but other than that I have not done anything else in regards to it, matters with the theives guild are too pressing at the moment.  I did however decide to take time to reforge the Gauldur amulet.  It is indeed a powerful item.  I intend to keep it secret and safe until I have a time to study it further.

Sundas, 11:00 AM, 7th of Evening Star

Well.  I am sober now.  Three days later.  Things have taken a change, perhaps for the worse, I'm not so sure yet however.  I do not remember doing any of the things I've been told I did, but apparently I caused quite a scene.  As in a have a bounty on my head that is over ten thousand gold.  I don't remember myself  these details, but according to the Imperial who pulled me out of the chaos I approached a guard and loudly began yelling at him, he said I shouted something and sent the guard flying across the room.  Needless to say, no one appreciated that, and a swarm of guards immediately swooped down to try and arrest me.  Well according to this Imperial I fought off half a legion of armed guards while not even able to stand up straight and did not show any signs of leaving the scene.  He must have grabbed me at some point in the confusion and dragged me down here to the Ratway.

I don't know if I owe him my life, or if he's full of dragon droppings.  Either way I was not pleased when I woke up with my wrists bound, my mouth gagged, laying on a dirty pile of hay.  He's released me now, sense I really have no desire to cause any more damage.  He says I shouldn't show my face until I find a way to clear my name.  The most convenient way of course would be by contacting the thieves guild, although they may be weaker now than they were in years gone by, they still hold enough power here in Riften that they could eradicate my bounty.  How I hate the thought of having to run errands for those lowlifes though!  I hate Maven Black Briar even more, the thought of being her thrall makes me sick to me stomach.

Turdas, 11:07 PM, 4th of Evening Star

Arrived in Riften this morning, I took a bit of a detour through an old draugr filled crypt and came out with the last word to my shout 'Kyne's Peace'  It calms animals within a radius well over a hundred feet now.  I'm not sure when I'll have need of it, but it's nice to have mastered another shout.

I still miss Erandur.  I'm on my second bottle of Black Briar right now, and I know I should slow down, but why stop?  I'm the Dragonborn, I should be able to at least drink myself into a stupor if I so wish.  And besides the Argonian here is giving me drinks on the house since I dropped off those amethysts he wanted so badly finally. Hope they have a happy life.  Or whatever.

A female Argonian who had a blasted long name gave me this funny lexicon, reminds me of another lexicon I had the other day, can't remember which one though.

There's a guard looking at me funny.  It's making me angry.

I feel sick.

Turdas, 2:04 AM, 4th of Evening Star

I'm camped out on the road to Riften from Whiterun tonight.  Erandur is no longer with me.  Although I see the sense in his decision to return to Dawnstar and continue to serve the people as a priest of Mara, I do not agree with his choice.  But then my opinion is probably biased for I had grown close to him as he had to me. Before we parted ways outside Whiterun he grasped my hand tightly, I could feel that their was emotion surging within him, yet we Dunmer are a stoic people, and he even more so for he is a priest who has sworn his life to a divine.  He said nothing else except the parting words of, 'May Azura smile upon you, and if your road leads to Dawnstar Nightcaller temple will always welcome you.'  I found it interesting that he invoked Azura's name in his parting words, and not Mara's.  But perhaps he knows that I find more comfort still in the traditional Deity of my people.

I miss him greatly, yet I am trying to help myself come to terms with the fact that he did what he must.  Had we stayed together much longer his conviction to Mara would have certainly been shaken, he said so himself.    He also told me that he had already abandoned one god, and he was not going to do it again.

I got attacked a few hours ago by a khajiit assassin   She had a note on her body from the Dark Brotherhood. Seems someone wants me dead.  I hope that Erandur does not also have evil stalking him, although he is a proficient fighter, he is not a warrior, he is a priest and he will not be prepared to defend himself against a trained killer.

I dropped off the inscribed lexicon to Septimus North of Winterhold College two days ago.  After examining it for what seemed like hours he finally yelped in glee.  It seems that the lockbox he is guarding can only be opened by Dwemer blood.  I found this to be a conundrum but Sigmus was not deterred.  He seems convinced that the blood of the Elven races can be mingled to form a similar blood type to the Dwemer.  He gave me a vial and asked me to collect the blood for him.  I was skeptical at first, as I have no intention of killing innocents to further his plans, but it may be easier to fill than I was expecting.  I have already been attacked by bandits once since then and have been able to collect both Orc blood and Altmer.

I suppose I should at least summarize my experiences in Sovngarde, and how I came to defeat Alduin in his own realm.  Perhaps posterity will one day find this little book and read its many cryptic notes and laugh in amazement that their ancestors were ever worried about such trivial things as mythical 'dragons'.

After I arrived in Sovngarde it took me a few moments to get my bearings.  I was very hesitant about moving at more than a snails crawl for with the utter silence that surrounded me I was unable to use my usual tactics of noting sounds and their echoes for scouting my terrain.  After what seemed like hours I finally arrived at what seemed to be a great chasm.  A huge Nord man approached me then and introduced himself as Tsun, the gaurdian of Sovngarde.  He told me in order to enter the hall of champions I would have to prove to him in battle that I was worthy.  I swear he must have gone easy on me, for it was not a very difficult fight.  Either way he allowed me to pass.  He must have been laughing to himself as he watched me creep across the great bridge of bone that connected the two land masses.  But I would much rather have a champion of Sovngarde mock me then fall to my death in the land of the afterlife...that poses an interesting theological question of what would happen next...but not interesting enough for me to get into at this time.

In the hall of Valor I was introduced to the original three Nord champions who brought down Alduin the first time.  They offered me their unwavering support.  Together we exited the warm feasting hall and crossed back over to the mainland.  By combining our Thu'um we were able to finally clear the mist and drive Alduin out of his hiding place.  He came swooping down in a cloak of fire, shouting curses at the four of us as he swept down.

This time the battle was so much easier than the first.  Although Alduin had already regained some of his strength, this time I had three Nord champions fighting with me who have done nothing but spar and feast and think of the glory of battle for thousands of years.  They were ready to kill a dragon, they knew his strengths and weaknesses already.  It was a glorious battle, and in the end, as Alduin screamed in pain as I ripped his very soul from his body I felt as if I really was a champion.

After the battle Tsun, the massive gaurdian shouted at me, and the world faded.  I'm assuming it was his shout which brought me back to the throat of the world.  My legs were weak when I finally was able to stand on the snowy mountain top.  Parthurnax was not the only mighty dragon who was waiting for me there.  All around the mighty mountain black dragons swarmed.  They all were shouting 'dragonborn' pledging me their allegiance.  Although not all dragons have recognized me as the vanquisher of Alduin, the true Dragonborn, many many have, and they told me that they would help me to search out the rebels and thus end the attacks on civilians.  It is a strange feeling to be revered by such mighty beasts, and one that I am sure I am unworthy of.  I certainly didn't feel the part of mighty dragon slayer as I stood wobbling on the mountain, fresh out of Sovngarde.

Regardless, although there are still a few dragons who wish to bring Skyrim harm, the vast majority of them seem to have moved higher up into the mountains and will not be a problem to the common folk anymore.  I believe that it is safe to say the dragon crisis is finally coming to an end.

Late Sun's Dusk?

I meant to ask Erandur when he was in here what day it was, but I forgot.  My head is still thick, but the Jarl's wizard says that I am healing well.  According to him I am afflicted with some sort of sickness caused by my brief time in Sovngarde.  I do not know why however.  Was it because I am not a Nord?  Or is it simply because I traveled to a plane of existence that only the dead are supposed to roam free in?  I do not know.

There is so much to tell.  I was able to use the Elder Scroll to travel back in time, or at least view the past.  It was a strange feeling indeed, seeing with my mind's eye events which happened hundreds of years ago.  The colors were all so vibrant, they made me miss my eyesight once again.  But the vision was brief.  I saw the Nord hero's bring down Alduin with the Dragonrend shout, I inscribed the shout in my mind so that I would not forget.  Then I saw them use the Elder Scroll which I was holding to send Alduin forward in time.  I do not believe that they had any idea where Alduin went however, they simply knew that he was gone.  That was all.  After I observed them use the elder scroll the vision abruptly ended.  But my time at the throat of the world was far from over.

Alduin himself must have felt me using the scroll, for he came flying through the sky, a streak of black in the pale blue heavens.  The fight lasted hours, long into the night, the only thing that kept me from freezing to death was the fiery breath of the two dragons who were clashing above me.  Paarthurnax proved a valuable alley, although Alduin was an even more powerful foe.  If it would not have been for the fact that it was three against one, I surely would have died on that mountain.  Erandur was the one who shot the telling arrow that finally drove Alduin to the ground permanently   But Alduin's revenge was swift, he lunged forward at my companion, his long, black neck writhing, snake-like through the air.  Although his attack did not fully connect, his ivory teeth came close enough to slash two long furrows through Erandur's back.  I knew in the frigid weather it would not be long before Erandur succumbed to either blood loss, shock or freezing.  I had to finish the battle quickly.  Erandur tried to get up to help in the fight, but Alduin was still after him, enraged I assume that the Dunmer's arrow had been the one which grounded him.  Paarthurnax distracted the black dragon momentarily with a bone rattling shout while I ran to my comrade's side.  He was resistant to my help, but I left him no choice.  I dragged him behind a large outcropping, telling him if he moved he would have my wrath to deal with.  He held my hand tightly before I left, and I could feel his eyes on me, imploring me to survive although he said not a word.  The moment left me with a strange, foreign lump swelling up in my throat.  Perhaps it was a sign of weakness  but it was the weakness I needed to win.  The thought of leaving this world at the jaws of the beast who may have sentenced my friend to death gave me the drive I needed to summon spells powerful enough to blast apart a cave troll.  Alduin's strength was quickly depleting, victory hung in the air.  And then the bastard ran, the coward leapt from the mountain top, used the momentum from his fall to find air under his wings, and he fled into the night sky.

I was furious.  His life had been but moments from ending under the power of my Thu'um.  I managed to get Erandur down the mountain to High Hrothgar where the Greybeards immediately set about tending to his wounds.  I was torn at that point.  I did not want to leave his side, yet I knew I had to track down Alduin and finish him while he was still weakened from our battle.  Yet there was another battle going on inside my very soul as I struggled to lay low feelings which I have not felt for many years towards another individual.  In the end it was Erandur himself who told me in a rather spiteful tone that if I did not leave and find Alduin, we were both going to die when the World-Eater came back, better prepared, for revenge.  It was this statement that decided me.  I spoke to the Greybeards briefly  asking them where they thought Alduin had gone.  There answers were unanimous:  Sovngarde.  Alduin traveled to Sovngarde when he was weakened to consume the souls of the dead and thus regain his strength.  But the way into Sovngarde was a secret only the Dov knew.  The answer was clear, I had to capture a dragon, one of Alduin's loyal followers, and make him pledge his allegiance to me and my Thu'um, make him show me the way into Sovngarde.

After a final goodbye to Erandur for the time being, I traveled to Whiterun to speak to the Jarl.  Many years ago the Great Porch of Jarl Balgruuf's castle was used to capture the great dragon Numinex by Olaf One-Eye.  It was my intention to repeat the trickery.  Dragon's are vain creatures, I was sure I'd be able to get one to fall for the same trap if I could only lure it in.  The difficult part was convincing the Jarl.  He would not allow me to use his palace in such a compromising way while Ulfric Stormcloak threatened to attack.  This made perfect sense to me, however it did make my job more difficult.  Long story short, after many hastened carriage rides between Solitude, Windhelm, and Whiterun  I was finally able to arrange for General Tulius, Ulfric Stormcloak, and Jarl Balgruuf to convene for a temporary peace conference at High Hrothgar.  It was the only place I could convince them to meet at.  The Greybeards are unanimously respected both by the Empire and the Nords of Skyrim, so it seemed best anyways that they hold the conference.

The conference was long, filled with prideful speeches by Ulfric whom I believe just loves the sound of his own voice, and a bit tedious.  But in the end the Empire agreed to hand Markarth over to the Stormcloaks in exchange for Riften and monetary compensation for the massacre at Karthwasten.  These were the terms of the peace until I was able to deal with the Dragon crisis.  I'm sure as I write this both sides are already gathering up arms again to dive into the foray.

Regardless, Jarl Balgruuf was satisfied and he opened his palace up to my use.  Thanks to Esbern and Delphine, who somehow heard that there were peace talks going on at High Hrothgar and decided to show up, I was able to learn the name of an Ancient Dragon who had been buried near Whiterun.

Standing on the edge of the Great Porch of Dragonsreach I inclined my face to the heavens and shouted with all my might.  For several seconds there was silence, I could hear the Whiterun guards shifting uneasily behind me in their bulky armor.  And then the roar of a dragon.  When the dragon came closer I could sense that it truly was a mighty beast.  However I had faced Alduin in battle just a few days ago, I felt no fear for this creature.  I shouted taunts at it from the porch drawing it in closer.  Finally it was within range, it came within mere meters of me, it's leathery wings beating the sky, making the banners of the castle whip wildly about in the artificial wind.  I leapt down from my perch, and I shouted Dragonrend with all my might.  The beast let out an unnatural howl of pain as the concept of mortality was pressed into its mind, it came crashing down into the great porch, it's tail smacking the stone work, causing mortar to fly everywhere.

The guards were ready with the great harness, they dropped it down upon the beast, clamping it to the ground.  Then began a great verbal debate between me and Odaving, the captured Dov.  He was naturally very resistant to answer my questions, but at the same time, he was my prisoner, and it was my Thu'um which had knocked him from the sky.  Finally we arrived at an impasse.  He told me he knew where Alduin's entrance to Sovngarde was, but there was no way for me to get there other than allowing him to carry me there.  Meaning that I would have to free him from the harness.  Both the guards and the Jarl bawked at this suggestion, all feared that the dragon would wreak havoc upon the castle if released.  Perhaps I would have been skeptical as well, if it would not have been for the fact that I have dealt with Paarthurnax, he is a very powerful dragon, he is also honest, loyal, and true to his word.  He has told me that this is how most Dov are, it is their lofty sense of honor which keeps them so.  Because of this knowledge, I decided to take my chances and let Odaving out of the harness.

I took a chance, yes, but it payed off.  Odaving did not leave me, nor did he attack the castle.  He waited for me to join him, crouched down low to allow me to mount him, and then, with a great beating of wings, he took to the sky.

I wish that I had eyesight, if only just for the time when I flew threw the air on a dragon.  What wonders and sights I must have missed because of my accursed blindness.

We made it to the mythical entrance of Sovngarde within an hour.  After Odaving left me there followed many hours of constant battle against every undead atrocity Alduin had ordered to guard his doorway.  It took every ounce of energy I had to keep carrying on.  At least my tenacity proved enough, and I reached the final challenge:  holding the key to the land of heroes was a Dragon Priest   At this point I was in no mood to be toyed with, as the priest seemed to want to do.  I evaded his energy bolts easily, constantly aware of my position on the high stone roof we fought on.  I slammed him with a barrage of fireballs, knocking him off balance, I charged in closer, another barrage of fireballs hit him, knocking him back further.  I continued my unwavering attacks, never giving him enough time to recover from one before I hit him with another.  At long last his empty corpse dropped to the ground  the silver staff, the key to Sovngarde fell from his bony hand.

Although I was tired beyond exhaust I could not stop yet, not when I was so close.  Grasping the staff in both hands I fitted it into the large lock in the floor beneath me.  I could hear the ground moving, feel the temple around me reshaping itself.  And then a hot breeze shot up an out of the floor, a nose like a great tornado came from just ahead of me, pulling me towards it.  I did not resist, the wind sucked my body off the temple floor.  Disoriented, I fell, down down into a silent void.

And then I stood upon firm ground again.  The air was hot and humid.  It was absolutely still and silent.  That was my first taste of Sovngarde.

There is more to tell but my head aches and my fingers are numb.  I must rest again.

Unknown

I believe that it has been many days, perhaps weeks since I last wrote an entry in this book.  I have been very ill.  Erandur is not here right now, he was wounded in the battle with Alduin, so I told him to stay at Dragonsreach.  I do not know where he is anymore.  I pray to Azura that he is still alive.  I do not know what ails me.  My head is thick, the air is thick, I find it difficult to breath and my very soul feels confined and constricted.  I wish I knew where I was, but I try to stand on my legs and they give way.  I cannot remain conscious long either, already I feel another rolling wave of blank nothingness sweeping over me.  Constraining me.  Threatening to take me under once again...Akatosh, save me...

Tirdas, 7:03 PM, 18th of Sun's Dusk

Finding Septimus' Outpost was easier than I had anticipated, it was fairly easy to spot once I climbed down the cliffs from the college.  Erandur easily caught sight of the thin column of wafting smoke out on the ice, and, assuming that there weren't too many people crazy enough to live over a frozen sea this far north, decided it must be Septimus Signus's outpost.  It was.  He was a crazy old mer, but he was able to at least point us in the right direction, which I was thankful for.  He said that there was an Elder Scroll hidden deep underground in the Dwemer city of Blackreach and freely offered me a small orb which he said would unlock the entrance.  I had never heard of this Dwemer ruin which puzzled me, as I had studied many of them, and read many tomes on them when I was looking for those Aetherium shards.  Septimus however was able to enlighten me slightly on why this particular ruin had evaded me, apparently it is so far underground that one must access it by traveling through another, nearby ruin.  The second ruin he mentioned was familiar to me, although I had never been actually near it and so thanking him for his cryptic information Erandur and I set off back across the ice.

Perhaps it is worth mentioning here that Septimus also gave me a strange Dwemer cube.  He said that the Dwarves had developed a way of reading the scrolls which prevented blindness.  Apparently they were able to somehow copy down the information contained in a scroll and transfer it onto a cube similar to the one Septimus gave me.  He asked that before I took the scroll for whatever purpose I needed it for, that I first use the Dwemer machine to copy it down for him.  Since he had helped me so much, I felt I must oblige him, however I do not intend on returning this cube to him until the dragon crisis is over, just on the off-chance that I may need it more than him.  Although granted I have no idea, and probably no ability to read what is inscribed on this cube.

Upon entering the first level of the ruins we discovered what looked like the remains of a camp sight which had not been abandoned more than a day or two ago.  However there was blood on the floor.  As we ventured in further we continued to see signs of blood and brief struggles, however no sign of actual bodies, alive or otherwise until we reached a much lower level.  Our first sign of the adventuring party came in the form of muttered Kajhiiti curses from up ahead.  We approached cautiously  it was obvious from the Khajiit's ramblings that he was in distress, it seemed that he was speaking to another party, although we never heard the other respond.  He attacked us on sight, and we were forced to kill him.  Erandur discovered a small journal near the head of his dead brother whom it seems he'd been speaking to.  Apparently they were part of a party who came down here to find the city of Blackreach as well.  The living brother had been a skooma addict and it seems that it had finally gotten the best of him.  How his brother died we weren't sure, either killed by Dwemer machinations, or the skooma addict.  Either way, he was quite dead.

As we ventured further into the ruins, we slowly discovered the rest of the adventuring party.  All dead, killed off one by one by either Falmer, or the Dwarven guardians   It's a pity they were not better prepared, but it seems it was their own over-eagerness and stupidity that got them killed.  Dwemer ruins are not to be taken lightly.

Finally we reached what appeared to be the entrance to Blackreach, a huge room, its centerpiece a strange archaic device which we assumed to be the lock Septimus had spoke of.  Septimus had told me that the orb he gave me would unlock the entrance, he was correct.  As soon as I inserted the orb into the device a humming noise filled the room, the floor below my feet shifted to reveal a grand staircase leading to a huge elevator shaft.  I was a bit concerned about getting on an elevator which was many thousands of years old, but there was no alternative.

Blackreach makes every other Dwemer ruins I've ever stepped foot in seem tiny.  This must truly have been a huge center point for trade and commerce back when the Dwemer were in the height of their power.  I felt almost as if I was outdoors at some points, the air, although moist was not thick or suffocating, in fact it seemed very healthy for plants and wildlife as there was plenty of both.  Even though there were a few Falmer settlements, it seems even those vile creatures had not ventured this far down.  We cleared out the few camps that we found, and then were able to walk in relative peace through this massive city.

Although I realize that I am on a mission which must be completed in a timely manner thus preventing the end of the world...allow me to go on a slight rant, as I am a mage and thus a student of all forms of knowledge.  Thus Dwemer city was filled to the brim with things which, if brought out into the light, could forever change the way that the civilized world views this ancient society.  First off, let me say that the lighting these people used was not anything ordinary.  Erandur described it to me in great detail, it seems as if all of their lights, which have remained illuminated throughout the decades are powered by some sort of magical energy.  In fact the whole place was overflowing with magicka.  I could feel it tingling in the air, hanging heavy around us.

There was what seemed to us to be a small arena near the war quarters, and inside another building seemed to be a large lecture hall and student quarters for eating and sleeping.  Perhaps the reason this powerful and intelligent race disappeared is simply because they became much too powerful, much too fast.  I can see no other reason why they could have vanished.  Or perhaps they discovered something else, something even more powerful and arcane.  Maybe they still walk among us, they simply transported themselves to another dimension.  If I ever have the opportunity to settle down, find my hiding place where I can set up a laboratory far from civilization...these Dwemer are going to be one of my prime studies.  I must, someday, learn the secret of their disappearance...

But I must finish this entry soon, as it is getting late, and Erandur complains he cannot get to sleep with the sound of my quill scratching on parchment.  We found what we though we were looking for when we finally arrived at the most prominent landmark of Blackreach, a great palace.  Although we searched it fully however, we found no Dwemer machination of the type Septimus described.  On a whim I decided to use my Thu'um, directing it at a huge magical orb which hung above the palace.  I wasn't really expecting anything in particular, Erandur and I were just tired of searching and I could think of nothing else to try.  The orb was laced heavily with magicka, so I assumed it must be linked to something.

Well, it did not open any secret door, nor did it reveal the way for us.  It did however make an earsplitting 'gong' which echoed loudly throughout the entire city.  I am glad that it is so very sturdy down there, or I would have feared an earthquake or landslide of some variety.

There was silence for a moment after the noise, but not for long.  Soon Erandur and I heard the sound of leathery wings taking to the air.  A noise both of us know well.  A dragon.  Yes, there was a very powerful dragon living down in the depths of Tamriel.  A dragon that took us a good hour at least to bring down, and even longer to finally vanquish.  It was the scariest dragon battle I have ever participated in.  The landscape of Blackreach is treacherous after all these years, and I do not know my way around anywhere near well enough to trust my footing much in battle.  I mostly resigned myself to hiding around a large wall near the palace and shooting out healing spells towards Erandur who was busy using his bow to down the beast.  Once it landed it was easier for me to help out, for although a dragon's breath attack is powerful, it is not nearly as fast nor graceful on land as it is in the air.

Once the ancient beast destroyed, we were both much more cautious for awhile, speaking in hushed voices and walking lightly.  We did finally find another tower which seemed to be some sort of laboratory.  Inside was what we had been searching for.  It took me many frustrating hours to figure out the ancient Dwemer machination, but finally I managed to make it do something.  Once I figured out how to operate the machine, it was only a matter of minutes before I managed to get it to inscribe on Septimus' cube.  Then it was just a simple matter of opening the shell containing the Elder Scroll.  It was such an amazing feeling of power when I laid hands on the scroll.  Of course I am incapable of ever reading a scroll, but even so I could feel a deep, arcane power, washing over me like waves.  Erandur was very hesitant to even look at the closed scroll, he made me place it in my pack out of caution.  I suppose he's afraid he'll suffer blindness but from my research one who has no knowledge of how to read the elder scrolls will also suffer no damaging effects from them.  Even so I had no issue with holding on to it myself.  An artifact of such value must be protected with the utmost of care.

After retrieving the Elder Scroll we used the elevator located conveniently inside the room to return to Skyrim's surface.  We ascertained that Dawngaurd was the nearest settlement, and Erandur knew the way, so that is where we are right now.  In the morning its back to High Hrothgar with this scroll.  Hopefully either Arngier or Paarthurnax will be able to tell me how to use it to travel back in time and learn Dragonrend.